Stop Press
April 30, 2008 by inspectorgadget
The Chief Constable of Ruralshire Constabulary has paid a secret visit to police officers on the front line in Ruraltown.
His visit to F Division lasted three hours. One Constable claims to have actually seen him over all the big hats of his entourage.
During the visit, the Chief issued a statement saying:
“I have now met all those aspiring for the upcoming Superintendent’s Promotion Board, and I would like to say how flattered I was by all the compliments they paid to me”
Asked by a local reporter if he had met the infamous Inspector Gadget, the Chief replied:
“Inspector who?”
He was then swept away in a high powered Volvo, flanked by a unit we have never actually seen before (despite the huge cost of maintaining it) called “The Motorbike Unit”.
I deplore this kind of behaviour from Chief Constables. To be fair to my chief he will regularly go out on patrol with officers from all divisions, and CSOs - and without any entourage and certainly without the media. Just puts a stabbie and a hat on and crews up with one of the rank and file.
Gets my respect for that.
Clouseau
The answer to this is clear. He is not the Chief, he is someone pretending to be the Chief.
Regards IG
I find that when the bigwigs come from HQ to do their annual 4 hours on the street, they just get in the way and a hinderance rather than help.
Morning all!
I’ve not seen my Chief Constable at all, but I had the dubious pleasure of working the Labour Party Conference at Bournemouth on mutual aid. The Dorset Chief Constable was out working nights with us, as well as doing stuff during the days and I’ve gotta say, I was surprised and even a bit impressed! Admittedly, I guess at the time he had a lot to lose if the wheel came off and in his situation, i’d be struggling to sleep at night too. Credit where credit’s due though…
(now watch me get shot down by the Dorset boys and girls!!!!)
dear inspector,
the local police where i live have heard of you, so never fear!
joker the lurcher
The present chief has never graced us with his presence, but the last, who sadly died young last year was respected by all. He used to visit on Christmas morning, with his children ! He would spend time talking to everyone, and leave a tin of Quality Street behind. He was a genuine bloke and a first class boss, the exact opposite of who we have now.
You are even mentioned in the canteens of Metrocity as well Mr Gadget.
The interesting thing is, you are referred to as “the guvnor,” “Guv,” or “Mr Gadget” quite a lot of the time. Rank still matters even in the online world - or is it that many PCs and Sergeants have more respect for an Internet Inspector Blogger than they do for their own guvnors?
IG.
I’m willing to bet a months overtime that he knew EXACTLY who you were.
A certain ginger senior ‘police officer’ who has been the source of controversy over the last few years recently went out with a specialist unit of his large farce.
Following a stop by that unit he was given the task of maintaining a cordon which he completed tits up.
Thanks for coming…
Well of course he knows who Gadget is. Er who is Gadget?
My chief is actually half decent. I’ve met him a few times and even seen him in the parade room at 6am on occasion.
If he could just have the nuts to tell the government where to stick their performance targets and let the officers on the street deal with things as they see best, rather than be dictated to by the machines of political policing
fox and the lion, AEsop
http://www.pagebypagebooks.com/Aesop/Aesops_Fables/The_Fox_and_the_Lion_p1.html
Inner-city’s Chief is hard on the outside and hard on the inside. No sense of humour. Even makes girls cry.
A ha! I see your chief is sporting the dress uniform of the Tittlebury Armed Police Support Unit with ceremonial big knife!
Suddenly, out of the blue, men appeared with large brooms and began sweeping the yard. A transit arrived and men in black began taking lovely crockery into the station. What’s happening we asked. Don’t you know, the Commissioner is paying a visit this morrow.
True.
Seen our chief in the corridor twice in 5 years. Seems nice enough but completely aloof and from what I hear, doesnt go out on patrol unless theres some media interest.
Shame
I can’t remember the last time I met a boss above the rank of C. Insp.
In the mid 1980s our Force did Mutual aid at the Stonehenge Solstice. We were having a meal in one of the Army camps when man in a suit came to our table and asked how we were geting on and how was the food. He was the CC or thereabouts of the host force, (or so we found out later) but t the time we thought he was the canteen manager. He is probably still wondering why kept on asking him about the size of the sausages and the lumps in the custard.
blueknight - made me laugh out loud! From now on I’m going to make it a personal challenge to confuse members of the senior ranks with random questions about foodstuffs!
At our regular get-togethers, we still talk of the day the new Chief popped into the nick whilst out shopping. He was, of course, in civvies and, despite his own policy, was not displaying his warrant card in the beautiful clip-on holder purchased at great, but worthwhile, expense. He was challenged by a young PC who said something similar to, “Excuse me sir, I don’t recognise you and you are not showing any identification, could you tell me who you are please?” “I am your Chief Constable.” came the reply. “In that case, sir, could you show me your warrant card?” “I’m afraid I don’t have it with me. But I do assure you that I am your Chief Constable.” The officer replied, “If you can’t prove you are who you say you are, I will have to escort you back to the foyer at the front of the station where you can sit until someone who does know you can confirm your identity.” With that, the officer gently, but firmly, took hold of the gentleman’s arm and escorted him to the public area of the foyer where he sat for about 3 minutes until the DCI escorted him back into the restricted area. The officer was spoken to about his actions and said the first thing that came into his head, “I can recall seeing his picture in the Force magazine but he looks taller in real life!” And people wondered why I never rose above PC.
As a MOP/Public Servant/Teacher I can’t claim to do as tough a job as your good selves, but I suspect our senior management drop from branches of the same tree as your Chief Constables.
We conduct a weekly Head-hunt, where we email each other with sightings of Head Teacher. The record is two sightings in one week!
Mind you, he’s never been known to go anywhere near a classroom.
Anyway, any chance of IG for Mayor of London?
Its not just CCs.
Our brand spanking new Super finally discovered where our station was today and decided to drop in for a visit.
His reputation goes before him.
Allegedly….he’s a bully and he doesn’t approve of women in the police.
I spent the day in custody dealing with baddies.
i’m sure I’ll catch up with him one day and have that meaningful conversation about why I’m not happy being barefoot and pregnant and cooking a casserole. Hmmmmm
I have a really good recipe for a lamb and lentil casserole… and you can get a really good pair of slippers at our local market…..I do not, however, do pregnant….
Cheers Guv,
you just ended my really crap day with a laugh.
Come! Come! Insp G you must have seen this time after time in the services…
Commanding officer: “How’s the men’s moral Sergeant Major?
Sergeant Major “Execellent Sir, coudn’d be better!”
Commanding Officer ” Well then! burn their mail and cancel their leave!!!!!
Personally, I react to the appearance on patrol duties of any rank above Inspector, with the same alarm that I would the appearance of the pilot of an aircraft pushing the drinks trolley down the aisle.
CC: “Have the men been ****ed about today, Superintendent?”
Super: “No, sir!”
CC: “Well, **** ‘em about!”
maximus otter
Steve @ 26
Like the analogy. The only difference between the pilot and the CC is that the pilot is in control and knows where he is going.
A PC colleague of mine had a great method of dealing with the higher ranks. The station we were at was a high profile one in a very large force and had lots of regular visitors with varying amounts of ’scrambled egg’ on their hats. On passing one of these senior ranks in the corridor, my mate would walk boldly up in front of them (having never met them in his life) take him in an enthusiastic double handshake proceed to pump their arm up and down, look them directly in the eye and say something like “Sir! How lovely to see you again. Haven’t seen you since we were together at training school. My, you’re doing well. Never thought you would come to much at the time. Great to see you again though. Must get off. Good luck, take care”. He would then walk off leaving the poor chap in his wake confused as hell. Very amusing to witness, especially when the ‘victims’ responded in a similar manner, pretending to remember my colleague.
That could indeed be a photo of a real Chief Constable(about 1932)
But it was probably only a Lord Lieutenant.
My own Chief Constable was
(tall, walking in long steps, North of the Umber).
And almost always carried a personal issue firearm.
(In Britain, a civilian would never, ever, ever, have obtained a firearms certificate on the same grounds that he gave.)
Anyway, long retired and almost 70, he still has the certificate with all of its variations, and the associated weaponry.
[I wonder who is monitoring him.]
Oops, have I just breached the Official Secrets Act?
No…
…You just be careful what you publish.
But, did your man have a permit for the sword?
Ours is coming in June, I have been handed the dubious honour of taking him out for a few hours.
Joy of joys, I cannot wait!
Maximus Otter
bless
Our new CC joined in January from a.n.other ruralshire force…
He’s liked by the troopers below the rank of Ch. Insp ‘cos the Chief said they were bullies and he doesn’t like bullies!!!!
He’s forced, probably by bullying no doubt the pol auth into spending more money on new body armour and now some new clothes for us to go and play in!!!
Seen him once at his meet me day! But fair play to him, so far, he’s come out and played the game on all areas and covered the usual sh*tty shifts Fri / Sat night on military pay weekend with no staffing - the ops team forgot to boosst the staffing for the nights he came down our way!!! I understand he even laid hands on more than one or two persons!!
I had the pleasure of driving my first Chief to several functions/engagements (one of the perks of being on Traffic).
He was a thoroughly decent man. Quietly spoken. Always immaculately turned out and genuinely interested in all of his troops (most of whom he knew by name).
Sadly missed.
Now on Chief Number 5.
I remember a load of pot plants ( No not that sort) and arbour trees in large stand pots being evenly disributed around the nick one morning because the home secretary was visting!
Whats wrong with that you might ask?
It was only David Blunkett!!!
I assume the plants and arbours were for his dog!
Not like the one where the chief came to visit with the deputy prime minister one evening and all uniformed Police officers were well entrenched elsewhere on the Division. As he began his walk about all he could see were PCSO’s on patrol. Clearly PCSO’s are working here.
How marvellous, a system that apparently seems to work.
We must have more on this evidence. Another success story.
Peace, tranquility, PCSO’s, Chief, Deputy thingy, press entourage, other uniformed bosses and hangers on.