Just Another Country
August 31, 2007 by inspectorgadget
I have been listening to Eton educated David Cameron claiming that there is “anarchy in the UK”.
I totally agree. There is certainly anarchy in Ruralshire.
Only the other day I personally witnessed a flock of sheep, the individual members of which were clearly out of control. They were running in all directions, devoid of any purpose and demonstrated an alarming lack of self discipline.
David would not want to live here. It can be dangerous.
I blame the demise of the good old English Sheep Dog. These wonderful animals have been replaced with less effective dogs. It’s true that they provide better value for money in that you can get more of them for less, but the quality is just not there.
Meanwhile, Ruralshire’s notoriously boisterous sheep have taken advantage of this trend, and are running amok with abandon.
On another note; I see that the Prison Officers walked out of HMP Ruraltown yesterday.
This is so unfair on the criminals inside. It breaches their Human Rights.
I mean, who is going to smuggle in their drugs and sim cards now eh? who is going to fix Wayne’s X Box 360 when it gets broken?
Get back to work Prison Officers, you know it makes sense.
Usually I thoroughly enjoy your comments, and agree with the vast majority - but I feel this trivialises what to many people is a very serious subject.
Mike P
I am trying to show that for the vast majority of people living in the UK, the story of violent streets and daily killings are just not our experience. In the countyside, we are SICK of the problems of the City being presented as if the whole nation is like that. Thanks for your comment though.
Think about it Mike, Sheep (the great unwashed) English Sheep dog (Coppers), more less effective dogs for less money (come on, i cant spell it all out for you)
Nice post Boss, good to have you back. started to think that you had been busted by the funny firm.
At last, someone is beginning to see the light. Baaaaaa. Shootings, stabbings, the increased ‘perceived’ fear of gangs of hooded feral youths, drinking binge culture, prison officers about to lose patience with the governments strategy on obligations.
Now its car windows being smashed left right & centre, where will it end ?
These inferior dogs, would they be Portland Cocker Spaniel Originals?
Thanks RWCin7days but even in retirement and with the brain cells dying by the day I think I can figure it out. Good of you to put me on the straight and narrow though, appreciated!
But I will repeat, Boss, that although you may be sick of hearing about the doings of the great unwashed it is a fact that millions of people live in cities, they may not want too - I know I didn’t, I just got posted there. And to many of those crime, or the fear of it, is of relevance and those lucky enough to live in ‘Green England’ should perhaps thank their lucky stars but still think of the poor unfortunate sod living beneath a factory chimney in Hull who is plagued to death by yobs, or worse.
Now, that should wind a few people up!
As reported here , Association of Chief Police Officers (Acpo) president Ken Jones said he was “baffled” by the description of crime levels and called for political leaders to be more “calm, measured and objective” in public statements about crime.
He told the BBC Radio 4 Today programme, (listen
here , first item)
“People are distorting the figures for their own ends and I think we need to try and rebuild trust.
“I think it isn’t a deliberate attempt to go out and distort; what it is is a lack of trust in the data.
“We are facing the lowest risk of being a victim of crime for over a quarter of a century. Violent crime is at the lowest it has been since the mid-90s.”
Hearing this interview, if I knew he would be attending, I would not bother calling the Police. Is he a politician in waiting?
You have missed out that the sheep dogs have been put on short leads and the lead is tied their kennels and the other dogs can only bark but can’t bite.
I seem to have missed the point of the post - I thought it was serious.
I live in a rural-ish town but the fear of being stabbed is a very real threat here. Daily I read in the news that someone in our small town or one of the surrounding towns/villages has been murdered for one reason or another. My own brother witnessed a murder with a base ball bat, and it was only last year that Mr Man was held at knife point while our home was burgled.
Nope, I wouldn’t sit in a field with your sheep for anybody. Bring back the sheep dog!
We have a sheep dog, it is a hooligan; it needs an ASBO and a rehabilitation program.
But the dog behaviorists point out there is no such thing as a bad dog, only a bad handler.
So we have only ourselves to blame.
And those new replacement sheep dogs I’m sure that they are getting younger. It was recently reported that one farmer was employing then as young as 16.
We have wee puppies working the glens these days.
As to the Prison Officers, I see HMG is not backing down. Doesn’t bode well for our own battle over pay.
One of our spaniels is 17yrs old. He’s a nice lad and a bit green. I can’t blame him really he was offered the role, and wants to gain the ‘life experience’ so many are turned away for not having. He hopes to become a fully fledged sheep dog by the time he becomes an adult.
What makes me laugh is that a 16yr old needs an appropriate adult in custody. Yet we can employ them in a reponsible position in our community, in our Police force and expect them to advise adults, sheep or not, and share their expertise on law and the like.
Hark! What is that I hear? Tis New Zealand calling yonder.
Canada or Australia can be heard calling.
In the Mail today here , Association of Chief Police Officers (Acpo) president Ken Jones said he was “baffled” by the description of crime levels and called for political leaders to be more “calm, measured and objective” in public statements about crime.
He told the BBC Radio 4 Today programme, (listen
here , first item)
“People are distorting the figures for their own ends and I think we need to try and rebuild trust.
“I think it isn’t a deliberate attempt to go out and distort; what it is is a lack of trust in the data.
“We are facing the lowest risk of being a victim of crime for over a quarter of a century. Violent crime is at the lowest it has been since the mid-90s.”
Hearing this interview, if I knew he would be attending, I would not bother calling the Police. Is he a politician in waiting?
On the money again IGand re HMP Ruraltown, I was shocked to learn recently that our HMP LittleCity has 200 mobile phones / SIMS in circulation on any given day. NightJack Trufax
Stinky, you’re right, 16/17 is to early to take a pup from it’s mum, it wouldn’t be properly weaned.
Are the sheep in NZ part of the attraction?
Not sure what the post is about, Gadget, but if you’re implying that Cameron is a pratt I am in total agreement.
In fact the only thing that gives me greater pleasure is that Jack Straw is his constituent, too. Though maybe it’s just a second (third, fourth) home.
Would not a puppy be treated in court as a puppy witness? (FFS)
“retired rushers Says:
August 31st, 2007 at 10:11 pm
Would not a puppy be treated in court as a puppy witness? (FFS)”
Now that is a very good point, if said Spaniel is a puppy still would they therefore be entitled if not required to undergo special measures should they have to give evidence in court.
Imagine that, puppy spaniel by live link or if its a bit of nasty job would they have to give a Video Recorded Statement is said puppy spaniel is only 16 years old.
“Best Practice” and “Achieving Best Evidence” as per the Manual of Guidance form 2 (MG2 for you non sheep) would seem to suggest its necessary and who would be said 16 year old Spaniel Puppy’s Appropriate Adult as it cant be anyone connected to the Police. Does its mum have to come into work at the end of the day to read and countersign the puppies statements? Finally what if said spaniel puppy did something wrong as so many younuns do these days, does it have to go to Puppy court instead of the big scary court?
Uphill - I hear the sheep in New Zealand wear lipstick and wink provocatively.
Funny thing is, you have a shortage of prison spaces and we just empted a whole prison here and are turning it into a football stadium (possibly). Madness.
As for sheep running amok, I blame in the influence of eastern european sheep with their knife culture. As some others have already pointed out we ned more laws. It’s been proven that if you make something illegal, guns, knives, mobile phones in cars - people will stop doing it…
OR we could have one less law… HRA for the win!
In Friday’s Mail here , Association of Chief Police Officers (Acpo) president Ken Jones said he was “baffled” by the description of crime levels and called for political leaders to be more “calm, measured and objective” in public statements about crime.
He told the BBC Radio 4 Today programme, (listen
here , first item)
“People are distorting the figures for their own ends and I think we need to try and rebuild trust.
“I think it isn’t a deliberate attempt to go out and distort; what it is is a lack of trust in the data.
“We are facing the lowest risk of being a victim of crime for over a quarter of a century. Violent crime is at the lowest it has been since the mid-90s.”
Hearing this interview, if I knew he would be attending, I would not bother calling the Police. Is he a politician in waiting?
notellin- If the new puppies have to give evidence in court would they not have to give their evidence in a juvenile puppy court and have their names (breed) withheld.
These new puppies are really going to frighten some of the old hardened sheep that roam around in the field that I work.
Your gibe about the prison officers is cruel but fair. For years it has been the great unsayable that the most of the vast quantities of drugs and mobile phones on the inside are taken in by corrupt staff. Nobody has had the balls to tackle the POA. It could be stopped if w wanted to stop it.
Bob, if the pups aren’t up to the job are the old dogs going to be able to learn any new tricks?
Bystander, as a MOP it has always puzzled me when I read about how many drugs make it in to prisons, I suppose what we read about is the tip of the ice berg?
The strange thing about sheep is that although they are frightened of wolves they don’t like the sheepdogs who protect them from the wolves.
never posted here before, tho I like your blog a lot.
I was reading a discussion on another blog about how onerous the requirements for recording stop and search etc really are, And I wondered what you made of it - be very interested to read your contribution.
The original article was at http://www.ministryoftruth.org.uk/2007/08/29/camerons-intelligence-crisis-part-1/
Thanks.
Can we have a glossary, please?
What is a MOP?
Mother of Prisoner? Member of Police? Mugger on Parole?
Take account of us outsiders.
Rod, LOL
My apologies, it is usually me that is asking to have the acronyms deciphered!
It is member of the public.
The sheep dogs nowadays don’t even herd sheep anymore. Poor value for money and then some!!